Monday, June 16, 2008

Disturbing Sight

The other day I saw a disturbing sight. The little boy across the street had on a Boston Red Sox t-shirt and a Yankees baseball cap. I was so troubled by this I told Da Man that I was going to go have a word with the twerp, I mean kid.

"Take it easy on him, he's only 5!" he says to me.

"Five is old enough to know better!" I reply as I head out the door.

"Hey Opie!" I yell out. "Who dressed you this morning?"

Opie beams and admits proudly to dressing himself.

"But honey," I ask sweetly, "Why are you wearing that shirt with your lovely hat?"

"Cause the Boston Red Sox rules!" he shouts out at me.

I swallow the bile that comes up into my throat at such sacrilege.

"But you shouldn't wear that shirt with that hat!" I say.

"But you gave me this hat," he says.

"Yes, I know, but not to wear with that shirt. That's a dangerous thing you are doing little guy. It could get you badly injured if you were to show up in a NY or Boston street like that. I mean if you can't handle the awesome responsibility that comes with the wearing of this hat, maybe I need to take it away from you!"

Opie blinks and then laughs and says "Aw you're just kidding!"

Since Opie's Mom has now come out to join us, I smile and laugh and agree that I am just kidding. But I ask him not to wear the hat with the shirt as it would be disrespectful to both teams. Ok he says, with a big grin covering his adorable little face. He runs into the house. A minute later he comes back out wearing a Boston Red Sox cap with the Boston Red Sox t-shirt. Little traitor. I'm taking my hat back.

27 comments:

laughingwolf said...

lol cute!

strugglingwriter said...

That is a disturbing sight. He clearly should've been wearing a Pittsburgh Pirates hat and shirt :)

JaneyV said...

That's baseball right?

Only kidding! I have a NY Yankees hat myself but I've never worn a single item of Red Sox memorabilia ever in my life. I do have a Mariners foam finger though.

Stephen Parrish said...

Go Cubs!

Sarah Hina said...

I think there was a rip in the fabric of space-time, thanks to that little boy.

Glad you set him straight, Ello. Kind of. ;)

Larramie said...

Guess he REALLY liked that cap!

Travis Erwin said...

What's it matter? were not talking about a sport that matters like football or hockey anyway.

Yes, I expect a smartass retort for that comment.

Erica Orloff said...

Is he being raised by WOLVES? What is wrong with his mother and father, letting him out of the house like that???? It's sacrilege. It's profanity.


GO YANKS!
E

moonrat said...

...you're a Yankees fan, Ello...?

Humm. Can we still be friends?

SzélsőFa said...

Did you make any use of the first hint I had sent you, Ello?

pjd said...

Smart kid. I like him already. Doesn't matter whether he's actually a Red Sox fan or not. He knew the perfect response--one that would get under your skin and also make it impossible for you to take the cap away at that particular moment.

Have you sought professional help, by the way? I mean, the first step to becoming a recovering Yankees fan is to admit you need help.

Merry Monteleone said...

All three of my kids have Red Sox shirts... and they all came down from their bedrooms wearing them, the first game the White Sox played them in the Championship series a few years ago...

Husband type person was not amused... but I'm a Cubs fan... which means I'll root for anyone playing the Sox and anyone playing the Cards... it's a rule... the fact that I married a Sox fan just goes to prove -

"Love and stupidity are the same thing, just spelled differently"

Charles Gramlich said...

I'm glad I don't own any clothes with baseball logos on them.

Melissa Marsh said...

I'm a Yankees fan, too. ;-)

March to the Sea said...

whoa..you are a yanks fan?! I might have to unsubscribe.....


i kid i kid. you are looking at the one guy in MA that is sort of "ehh" on the Sox.


Bruins..that is another story

Patti said...

i don't know if you are aware that you are spelling "socks" incorrectly. just here to help...

Mary Witzl said...

I'm the sort of person who couldn't give a rat's ass who wins what or who's playing or what sport it is, even. I suspect that my lack of interest would not be interpreted as neutral, but rather hostile. I'm always worried that someone will find out how sports apathetic I am and come take away my American passport.

But you could sell this, Ello, it's funny and well written.

Anonymous said...

I grew up in New Hampshire, with a die hard Yankees fan for a father. My father used to drag me to Fenway Park (because that was closer to our house than Yankee Stadium) wearing a Yankees hat. Had I known about Children and Family Services back then, I probably would have reported child abuse.

Cheryl Kauffman (John's wife)

Vesper said...

Cute kid!!!
(Sorry, Ello... :-) :-) :-) )

Larramie said...

Hmm, is Patti serious? :)

ChrisEldin said...

Have you not heard of the Orioles? Or the Nationals? They are your neighbors. Your friends.
Why must you tie yourself to NY?
WHY!!!??!!!
:-)

Steve Malley said...

Me, I don't follow the footyball...

;-)

Robin S. said...

You baseball fans are an amazin' group!

My cousins have your baseball fever, er, I mean fervor, right on down to boxes of now valuable baseball cards. When I go to their houses, I'm forced to watch the Cubs.

blogless troll said...

OK, I get you're trying to help this misguided youth by showing him the error of wearing a Sox shirt, but the Yankees? What are you trying to teach him? That if you spend enough money you can buy a few championships every 15 years or so? You should direct him to a real team, like the Marlins, who win a World Series every five years like clockwork, then sell off the entire team and rebuild from scratch just because they can.

jason evans said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
jason evans said...

Self mutilation would have developed eventually. You saved him.

Arlyle said...

Funny.